heres a fun fact that shows a lot about me: im pretty allergic to bananas but didn’t know it at all growing up until one day when i was like 17 i was like “man, i love bananas. theyre always so tangy and make ur mouth all tingly” and my friend was like “thats. definitley not what a banana is supposed to be like” one doctors trip later, turns out im fucking allergic to bananas.
mom, dad, im gay. im very gay. haha tricked you i mean gay as in happy. pretty happy to have another mans dick in my ass
you: i’ll have one beer please
me: oh sorry we don’t drink here, this is a straightedge bar
you: so what do you do?
everyone in the bar: